What if we would take each experience just like a stand-alone life lesson? What if “we wouldn’t judge so much according to our likes and dislikes” and we would try to learn the lesson out of the experience? (Thank you Arvind!) What if we would take the best of the worst?
Hard job, right? Who said it’s easy?
In general, the lessons from a difficult experience are easier to acknowledge once the storm has passed, but when in the middle of it, it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel and say “Hey! I am alive!!”.
Last couple of days, I had a very strong feeling of “I’m so happy and so grateful for my life.” A few times, I was sitting in meditation and suddenly I felt like crying, but these were not sad tears, but happy ones. A deep feeling of peace is inside my heart.
I wouldn’t change absolutely anything at the moment. I work hard and I practice discipline and commitment every single day. And when some struggles make me feel overwhelmed, I remind myself that nothing compares to that moment, when a little girl had to accept that she doesn’t have a father on this Earth… anymore. When one experiences something of this kind, it makes you question everything and see yourself as something bigger than what is noticeable to the eye.
Any difficult experience will bring more clarity, awareness and strength, but only if you really want it to. You will always have the choice to feel sorry for yourself and think “Oh,poor me”, but is it going to help?
I learned to love the struggles, the tiredness (that I feel sometimes), the sore muscles, the imperfections, the messy part of the process of knowing myself better. All of it! It makes me human. It makes me feel alive and to be grateful for being alive.
I love the person that I’m becoming: mature, still a playful child in some way, more aware of myself and others (I’ve never been so awake before. Of course, there is always place for improvement!) I don’t feel afraid of losing something anymore and I simply try to LIVE my life. As Steve Jobs once said, “Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”
I am not blaming others anymore if something bad happens. I am the one that should decide how to feel, what to think, what to do. We create our own paths in life and the ones responsible for our actions and reactions. There is, of course, the unpredictable, but most of the time, we do have the power to decide and to choose what to do next…
6 years ago, I was starting my first and only so-called “serious job”. I was 23, trusting everyone and everything, with a lot of eagerness to learn and to grow. In just few months in that big corporation, I was losing my smile. It was clear for me that I was not made for it. I was searching and searching and struggling to find myself and to find my path. I was so disappointed of the environment and the management of that company that instead of getting the best out of people, it was taking advantage of them and showing the worst out of each individual.
It would have been so comfortable and easy to stay in that “grown-up world” even though I was not happy. I can recall someone telling me once that I am being naive thinking that there are actually many people in the world liking what they are doing. The person was trying to send me the message that it is normal not to like your job. Well..call me naive, but I do believe that we are not made to live only for the weekends and few weeks of holidays per year. And this comes from someone who knows what struggle is, who has seen her family struggling throughout all of their life. I do believe that you can be whatever you want to be if you want it bad enough. When you decide, the universe will find a way for you to be happy. But if you search that happiness only in material stuff and allow the fear to take control, it will never happen.
I never believed it is normal to be in a place full of fake smiles where people hate each other without daring to say it while looking that person in the eyes. Something deep inside my heart believed that there is another way. That life must be something else. And I really wanted to live my truth and my path.
When I think about the person that I was few years back and the time and energy that I wasted in that job, I ask myself: “Was is worth it?” And the answer is “YES”, definitely yes! Why? Because it has taught me so much of what I don’t want to become. Because it has showed me that this is not how I want my days to look like. It brought me where I am now and yoga to my life. It made Unfold Your Mat a reality!
I am thankful for all those back pains and achy hips while sitting on that chair at H…C. I am thankful for each stressful day. All of that has taught me that movement is life and I as a human being, I am made to move. It helped me better understand our modern society and empathize with my students. I will continue to encourage people to move more every single day.
Trading high hills and corporate dresses for sweaty yoga clothes and bare feet has been the best I’ve done so far.
We have the power to change ourselves! But are we going to do it?
© Unfold Your Mat 2016